Fasting, waking up at certain times to pray, eating only ‘morally admissible’ foods, pilgrimage, practising rituals, and, it’s all done with one thought in mind – To feel to have ‘done’ something nice towards god. Let’s dive deeper into such thought pattern to recognise the real reason for such acts/rituals/karma. First, all these actions have a common denominator- sacrificing something- be it food, or time, or certain social indulgences. All these sacrifices are bonded with strict personal discipline. And yes, there’s an ulterior motive behind any such sacrifice, i.e. a divine reward in the end. To discover that the human race which generally finds it challenging to unite on most aspects of life, would unite in such quirks is a pleasant surprise; I would even call it a celestial miracle. However, as with every sacrifice, there’s an element of pain involved, and pain can’t be positive. The concept raises serious questions- Why would one think that a negative act would appease Gods? In fact, who in the right mind feels contented by inflicting pain on oneself? Well, having gone through moderate sacrificial rituals and self-imposed discipline on myself during my own spiritual voyage, I can say with some degree of authority that any amount of calculated self-denial does induce a weird rush through the veins, however temporarily. It stems from the basic human psychology of not valuing something which is availed too easily in life – It’s a disorder of the mind. On the other hand, anything that is difficult to reach stirs excitement in the heart to conquer it. I too felt that quirk, in the beginning, but as I progressed through my spiritual journey, I began to question the logic of the whole ‘no pain, no gain’ ideology. I realised that we all love to be victims, to a certain extent, in order to justify our needs. This is the only way we feel ‘deserving’ or ‘worthy’ of a reward, in the name of being moralistic. The extent of self-pity varies from being excessively more diligent than others to earn the same wages to denying oneself of one thing to receive the other. So, it implies that unless one becomes a victim in the eyes of god, one doesn’t feel qualified for god’s charity. Hence, the more sacrificial pain one inflicts on self, the bigger the reward could be anticipated – Therefore, ‘No pain, no gain’. While going through self-growth, even I felt that I almost desired the Universe to feel sorry for me by seeing how much I was suffering by waking up at that ridiculously early hour to pray, when every fiber of my body actually craved to curl up in the cosy lap of sleep, or when the target of ‘tenth of a day’ to spend worshipping interfered with a lot of social fun I could have had instead, or when I endured stomach pangs while denying myself the food I loved so much in order to impress god, and I hoped the lord had seen my suffering in all the rituals I had endured, through the fine lens. I also wished that Almighty would be extremely generous in his appreciation of my performance. I didn’t receive what I expected from my precious sacrifices, but I was rewarded with something beyond. When my hopes crashed to fall flat on the ground, it compelled me towards some soul-searching. I sought the truth about my own weaknesses which triggered an anomaly in my thinking pattern. I wasn’t much proud of what was divulged to me about me. I realised that to exert all my energy to be a victim was pathetic, not spiritual. This was not devotion to my Nirankar, but self-absorption, inflating my own importance by over-valuing my superficial karmas and inflicting pain on myself that God certainly didn’t intend. My focus was digressive and my belief had no gravity at this stage. I eventually discovered that God doesn’t want to see me suffer or in pain. Isn’t the whole point of praying is to ease the pains in life and lessen the sufferings that fate has already deposited in our account? Then why self-inflict more pain voluntarily? There is a difference between sacrifice and suffering. Suffering is painful, and pain is negative. God would like a positive sacrifice, but not see his children suffering. Ever since God blessed me with new vision, I began to strive to sacrifice greed, sacrifice laziness, sacrifice self-loathing, sacrifice self-obsession, sacrifice doubts in self and the Lord. Sacrifice is to give up fairly, and the rewards are showered by default – Leave greed and receive contentment, leave self-loathing and receive self-respect, leave ego and receive peace, leave lethargy and receive health, leave doubts and receive belief. So, fast by all means when one can grow above material cravings, wake up early to pray when you’ve conquered sleep, perform any ritual if it motivates you, painlessly. One won’t need to calculate the 10th of 24 hours if one could remember God all the time, consciously or subconsciously. To sacrifice effectively needs learning, practice, and self-growth. But do it happily, willingly, and without suffering.
The title seeks to draw your attention towards prioritising the right thought in your mind. Most of us desire to stay positive but don’t know how. One might think that the early stage of transition is very stressful, and it’s understandable. However, instead of panicking, one must seek to find out the root cause of stress. You’ll find that negativity is rooted in the past, most of the time, or stems from worrying about the future. What has always worked for me is- ‘ Focus on the positive situations in the current life, however small it might seem on the surface’, like being alive, even if life is not yet entirely as you hoped for. Once you’ve ‘felt’ the blessing of life, you focus on a tentative action plan to improve the present situation. To ‘feel’ your thought is the best means of communication with self and the Universe. I’ve also used the word, ‘tentative’ for any plans since the small details contributing towards the end product of your goal could change, and this change would only prove that your mindset is maturing. Go with the flow, and Nirankar/ God/ Universe shall enlighten the way forward. But you must invest real action, not just hypothetical idea, towards your goal. It’s true- when one takes one step towards God, the almighty pulls the person ten steps towards himself. Again, the concept of ‘god’ could mean many diverse images for different people. No way is a wrong way towards spiritual growth from within. You’ll discover that your first step towards your goal is the most important step in the journey, as it shows determination, resilience, and commitment one is ready to dedicate to reach the target. The universe doesn’t expect a person to be a superhero but sincere in desiring and manifesting, within moral encompass. Right thought is the springboard to bounce one forward. Before I proceed further, just a question- ‘Haven’t you already forgotten about the stress, thinking about how to stay positive? Aren’t you instead thinking about your inner growth, about the desire, and about the step towards manifesting it? If the answer is ‘Yes’, then this article has successfully elucidated a technique to ground your focus towards what matters in the scope of a plan to improve life. If one starts right, one can hope to win the race. Isn’t this positive? So, why stress when it’s so easy to evaporate negativity? The mind makes difficulty more difficult, and equally, ease easier. The choice is yours.
To create positivity within it’s mandatory to gather your focus on yourself, so you could isolate the negative anomalies. Believing in this principle, I do believe in minding my own business and focusing on my own life. However, when one lives in a shared society it’s almost unavoidable to observe certain social abnormalities and shortcomings. Even though it doesn’t replace the positiveness inside, it does create certain ripples in one’s temperament, however temporarily, but one becomes seriously exposed to negative emotional radiation, and if exposure is continuous, it could pose jeopardy for the mindset. Not mega issues, but day-to-day mundane anomalies leave you feeling frustrated at times. Let me list a few here, and I am sure most readers be able to relate to a similar experience. I often see people standing at the bus stop or walking through a high street, or just being in the public domain, and spitting. Disgusting habit and I don’t feel guilty to grimace. If there is a medical reason, then we’ve murdered enough trees to make tissues out of them; at least let their sacrifice be worth it. Such behaviour often manifests out of a lack of self-awareness and total disregard for others.
Coughing without covering the mouth with a hand, is another un-sociable behaviour. Especially after Covid-19 invaded the world and locked us in our own homes, I would have expected greater realisation about the effects of our actions. But I forget the human race can be both, short-sighted and selfish. Our history proves, alas!
Whether in a pub, public place, or even shockingly in restaurants, it’s cringeworthy to see at least one ‘lady’ who would not wash her hands after doing business in the washroom. It’s called ‘wash’ room for a reason, for God’s sake! Since I am a woman I can only talk about my own gender, but doubt the story is much different in the men’s world. Exceptions, hopefully, they might be but is still very unpleasant to witness.
I love the invention of earphones. But some people still find a way to raid your ears! Mobile phones are a great asset if we know when, how, and how much to use them. However, you involuntarily learn a lot about other unrelated people in who you might not be interested even remotely. I am sure whoever uses any means of public transport has experienced this at least sometimes.
Have you heard someone snot, and continue to do so, totally oblivious to the fact that he/she is making someone around feel nauseous? I call it impolite ad inconsiderate, to say the least. Tissues again, please.
Starers! God, what’s their problem? Sometimes I feel some of these wide-eyed human beings don’t mean to be rude- I accept it, BUT, it’s a lack of self-awareness.
In the end, I would stress on the importance of ‘Taking responsibility for own actions’, ‘ Growing Self-awareness’, ‘Having consideration for others around’, and basically- learn manners to be social beings. All these small good behaviours corroborate to appreciate inclusiveness and build a polite individual. If being considerate towards others isn’t an essential ingredient for developing positivity, then what is?
‘The tripping overs, the regaining feet, and still enjoying’
What a juxtaposed experience my recent visit to India was! A couple of days at the base, i.e. Delhi/ Gurgaon and we were back in the air to Goa. Here are some of the highlights of this exotic land within the same country. The best part of Goa, the North : Goa started with Le Meridien hotel in the North of Goa, which catered to all the needs of the guests from breakfast to dinner, from bar to swimming pool, from comfortable room to clean bathroom, etc. But isn’t it a standard for all 5 stars? Absolutely. However, it lived up to our expectations. Now for the streets outside the hotel: Congested with mixed traffic, with no pavements to walk. So, one needs eyes at the back of the head, literally. But the bars and restaurants are worth a nudge and a push. There are many and equally good ones, so not mentioning any specific names here. Calangute beach is one of the best in Goa since Bagha beach can seem overwhelmingly busy, especially on a weekend, and with the influx of people, the cleanliness on the beach is compromised too. Stay away from Bagha beach on weekends or holidays. But North is where fun is, overall.
The highlight of South Goa: ☺The jewel in the South of Goa has to be the ‘Go Daddy’ casino on the boat. t With the rooftop lavish buffet, bar and late-night live performances is a ‘must to experience’ the essence of south Goa. Apart from this, much of the South is dull and boring. There are a number of five stars hotels in the south, but post Covid, the standard seems to have gone gravitationally towards the south too- pun intended. The lowest point of South Goa: 😒I have to quote a shocking health episode of dysentery, the worst I’ve ever experienced in my not-so-young life. I don’t exaggerate. Hold on, the shock is still not revealed- the issue occurred after eating in Taj Forte Agueda. It seems that Covid has taken its toll on this hotel. The floor had dried spillage marks, and in hindsight, we should have taken the hint from this, but the name TAJ was a pretty thick blindfold. The staff had a ‘not bothered’ attitude. The serving staff member, called Sheekha, was rather rude; more interested in chit-chatting with bar and kitchen colleagues than paying attention to the guests. Most items on the menu were not available, since it was afternoon time and the staff being busy with the evening preparations for valentines! At least, according to Sheekha. Never heard of such a pathetic excuse in a five-star hotel before. Since we had travelled long from the north to the south and felt tired and hungry, we had no choice but to accept whatever was on offer. The food was 2 stars at the best- even though, not much cooking was involved in a chicken sandwich and mixed veg sandwich. The attitude of the staff was 1 star, and I am being generous. By nighttime, we discovered how much the third-class food had actually cost us. It ruined five following days of our holidays due to an upset tummy, or so we thought. The fact is, my GP has referred a few more tests for bacterial infection, for me and my hubby since we still haven’t quite recovered from the episode. However, we continued on our trip, with just sips of water on days and a bit of a bite on another. We returned to Delhi for a few days before taking off in the air to the north of the country.
Udaipur, the city of lakes in Rajasthan: Thanks to a nice doctor in Gurgaon, we managed the rest of the trip. After a few days here we gallivanted to Udaipur. What can I say, we had heard a lot about this city of lakes: beautiful scenery, and romantic ambiance. All boxes ticked since we planned our 30th anniversary in the Lake Pichola hotel, which is situated on the lake, literally. The best thing about this hotel is its rooftop restaurant by the lake, which looks absolutely stunning, especially at night time. Food is very spicy unless you remember to instruct the staff to keep it mild while ordering. The staff is very polite and wants to please. The room was very spacious, decorated with retro furniture, but the television won’t work unless you create a fuss and then the manager would help. The bathroom has a strange setup- Behind the clear glass door, the toilet seat is well exposed since the shower curtain is only big enough to cover the small shower cubicle. But the manager was honest enough to tell that there are many pending repairs that need attention this year, which were delayed due to business losses in the Covid times. At least they didn’t cover up. Be prepared: TV is a must in the evenings after dinner, since there’s not much going on in the hotel or around after dark. It’s a very quiet and early-sleeping city. It might suit some, but not everyone. Beware of narrow lanes and by-lanes when travelling or walking in restrictive streets, even during day time. Cars, scooters, cycles, people, and you name it, can cause serious congestion. We went for four days, which was too long. A couple of days in this quiet and slow-lane city/village are more than enough.
Gurgaon/Delhi: Finally, we returned to the base, Gurgaon, for the final phase of our tour. We explored Cyber hub, World Mark in Aerocity, DLF Mall and Select City mall in Saket New Delhi, Connaught Place, Jan path, Qutab Minar, Greater Kailash M block, and all that we had visited last time in 2019. Since my last visit, there has been an addition of newer restaurants and the ones I would recommend are, Daryaganj, Dhaba, Mala Akbari, and Delhi Darbar for main meals, Tim Hortons café, and light snacks at Bikaner and Haldiram. The one I wouldn’t recommend is the Yeti Tibetan restaurant in the Cyber Hub of Gurgaon, which is a mishmash of Chinese, Vietnamese, and Tibetan – completely unpalatable. Also, there is such hype about 32 Avenue in Gurgaon, which is just a rip-off for drinks, but one restaurant with the best chicken tikka is worth mentioning here- ‘Bhavan’ restaurant. The food is good and the service is excellent. Mostly the whole concept of this avenue is catered around a girlfriend-boyfriend theme, and when cupid has blinded everyone with love, who cares what they are drinking or eating. That seems to be a general impression, but Bhavan is a nice choice for decent food. Overall eating experience in Delhi: There are many other restaurants in the overpopulated city of Delhi, but, eat at your own peril since the hygiene didn’t quite tick the box for me in many of these outlets, and I kept well away. That, and once bitten twice shy after my experience in Goa. As a result, one might feel that you are limited to the same few restaurants since others cater more for the locals with very spicy taste buds. India overall has turned the heat on spices by ‘a lot since I was there five years ago. Reason? My guess is that fewer and fewer Non-Resident Indians (NRI) and foreigners are actually going to India post-Covid. Dangerous roads and drivers: One big deterrent not to rush back to India is the mad traffic on the roads and the driving stunts. No one follows lane discipline or speed limits; in fact, there are no driving rules. Everyone wants to cut in front of everyone else, from left, right, and behind. Undertaking is normal; well, in abnormal driving conditions where one drives ‘on’ the lane markings rather than between them. No gap is left between two vehicles, and braking almost guarantees collision. That’s exactly what happened to us. It was on a National highway and sharp braking caused a multiple-vehicle collision, but we are alive to tell the tale because the speed was slow, by chance. It shook us badly. In moments, not just our lives flashed in front of our own eyes but the thought that our children were in London, and if parents were wiped out on Indian road, they wouldn’t even know for a long time, with all the red tape. I get a shudder even thinking about it now. In the mix of all this chaos, Uber drivers are addicted to mobile phones while driving. One such driver was scheming to get the dad of a friend’s girlfriend drunk so he would agree to his daughter marrying her boyfriend! He suggested to the potential groom that if the father still didn’t agree then the only way would be to push him into a village pond since this is exactly what the hero did in a Bollywood movie called, ‘Dabang’! The forty-minute drive could be entertaining in normal driving conditions, but not when the driver is trying to be a Bollywood mafia while almost driving into every other vehicle. It felt like we were in a drunk taxi. While now I can laugh at such ridiculous plotting, it was also very dangerous as we had to warn him about the approaching bus from the left. Had we not shouted he would definitely scrap past the big vehicle, or worse. Last day while travelling to the airport, the driver had two phones- one in his lap for texting and the other for satnav. At one stage, he was cruising with both hands off the steering wheel, and once again, my husband had to tell him off. On the bright side, I was praying with undivided focus as never before, all the way through and my prayers were answered when we reached the airport, without any incident. Miracles do happen. Honesty at its best seen in Delhi : Not all was doom and gloom. I was saving the best for the last- ‘Honesty thy name is Starbucks’. It so happened that I misplaced my mobile phone in Starbucks, and went back to ask if anyone had found it. But the first time I was told that no one has handed it over. So thought that it had been stolen. Went to the Connaught Place police station to report. We had heard a lot of stories about Delhi police, so I was quite apprehensive about the attitude, but they were all very helpful and very polite. It was a sigh of relief too. I still didn’t give up and continued to call Starbucks from my husband’s mobile, just to satisfy my suspicion, and guess what? Finally, someone picked up the phone and I heard the miraculous words- ‘Starbucks confirmed that the phone was with them!’ Thanks to the staff, Ajay and Mohan. Mohan used his initiative to remove the sim from my mobile and use it through his phone since my phone was on airplane mode, and called back my husband’s number. He confirmed that the phone was handed over by someone the same day. We immediately went there which took a couple of hours, and they had my phone ready for handover. I was so grateful for their help and as my appreciation offered some monetary reward, but they turned it down saying, ‘This is our job. We can’t accept a financial reward for it .’ I was well-chaffed. I shall be writing separately to Starbucks to recognise the initiative, service recovery, and honesty of the two staff members involved.
With all the ups and down during the Indian trip, I still would say that overall we enjoyed the holiday. I have to give credit to my own resilience too. Actually, it’s a must item to pack if you’re planning an adventure to India.
As with most years, 2022 too has been an eventful year of sweet but mostly sour incidents. From manmade disasters, like Ukraine- Russia war to natural calamities, such as floods in Pakistan; the passing away of queen Elizabeth of age, to the tragic and brutal killing of world music icon – Sidhu Moosewala in India; Global inflation surging, making rich richer while poor choose between ‘heat or eat’ this winter; and the list goes on. Nevertheless, there has been a stubborn glint of hope too – however faint, but definitely silver in tone, amongst the thick dark clouds: Covid seem to ease out this year, at least in most parts of the world-winter Olympics in China was testimony to human resilience against pandemic; Common-wealth games in the UK, FIFA World cup in Qatar, are few events which brought people from all corners of the globe to a common platform of entertainment, and other such events. But admittedly, most current affairs are wet blanket and the year was not the best in the history of time. The most optimistic spark that escaped the wildfires of the year so far is the fact that ‘I am alive’ and that ‘you are alive,’ despite all the challenges. This surely demonstrates human resilience and tenacity. This is a befitting cause to be grateful to God. 🙏 Like every year, most of us enter the new year with hopes and dreams about what is to come, while celebrating whatever was left behind – cherishing the good memories and gladly going past the bad moments. This is how I say goodbye to the past and welcome the future. No one jiggles at someone’s wailing, so, instead of crying about what is happening outside, close the doors, switch off, and relax in your own company. Time to recharge energy. Remember, you are your own best friend, confidante, and reliable support. Once you’ve regenerated your body, spirit, and soul, it’ll only be a matter of time before someone would be attracted by the vibrations transmitting through your doors, and you’ll hear them knocking. Let them in, serve them a hot cup of your smile with cookies of laughter. Don’t worry, no one would suspect that you are infecting them with hope and mirth, but they shall catch the vibes. Loan out interest-free reassurance. Share your positive mindset so no one goes hungry for love. Let your warm kindness wrap around the hopeless in the bitter winters and may the cool shade of understanding calm someone against the scorching heat. Charity is not always in monetary form; just being humane to others is the best gift to humanity. On that note, Season’s greetings to all, and may the new year be the beginning of world peace. 2023, be the year of manifesting hope.
Let me start with defining the struggle between a mind and a heart here first – ‘My mind says I want more money…..my heart asks, ‘How much more?’ My mind has no answer except for saying, ‘More, and just a bit more.’ Heart cautions the mind, ‘It’s greed, it’s not moral.’ The mind dis-agree and protests! The mind feels self-righteous because it believes that it has been ‘god fearing’ all its mortal life, has not thieved, has tried to face all the problems with resilience, have marched on as a brave soldier- come what may, have helped others and made them a priority over itself, told only innocent lies, worked hard all life, suffered pain in silence…..The mind goes on and on until the heart slaps it to shut up and listen. Now the debate takes a new turn. Heart quietens the mind and says, ‘You needed to connect with God, not fear him – Fear projects false belief. You shouldn’t have ‘marched on’ the path you didn’t agree with – it’s important to choose the right direction than continue to walk in the dark. Self-sacrifice is synonymous with self-pity. You shouldn’t talk just to please others; your words are the mirror of your thoughts. Asking for help when in trouble, is not a weakness but common sense. God helps those who help themselves.’ Now, it was mind’s turn to shut the heart up, and shout, ‘ Ok! I understand, but don’t go on to put me down since my attentions were good.’ Heart smiles because the mind has understood that all the misconceptions about its beliefs had coated its vision with layers of negativity, so much so that it couldn’t see even its own desire clearly. Heart spoke softly, ‘ Take a deep breath and answer again- ‘Do you want more money?’ ‘How much more and why?’ The mind had calmed down and answered, ‘I have some – Thank you, Lord. With his grace would like just enough to tidy my life up so I don’t have to worry about my necessary obligations when I pray. I don’t want any more than that.’ The heart hugged the mind and they both uttered, Amen!’ Moral of the story- It’s not always what you think is, unless you feel it too. The heart or our subconscious, and the mind or our conscious, have to be in perfect harmony to walk on the right path to reach the blessed destination. This is how a positive mindset is created.
“To drive fearlessly to win is to win another race – the race against fear – (trophies themselves are but symbols to delight old age) -LF (from the ‘International Grand Prix Book of Motor Racing’ (Edited by Michael Frewin and first published by Leslie Frewin http://www.craigsquotes.wordpress.comhttp://www.racetothechequeredflag.wordpress.com “I want to write with/in a spirit of […]
Pagina dedicada tanto a noticias sobre cine, cómics, videojuegos, libros o series. Además, no faltarán reseñas de cualquier tipo o información sobre festivales y eventos
The Rudi-Grant Connection combines the knowledge provided by Human Anatomy with the experience of Service in the Army Medical Corps to investigate life and death.
Pagina dedicada tanto a noticias sobre cine, cómics, videojuegos, libros o series. Además, no faltarán reseñas de cualquier tipo o información sobre festivales y eventos
The Rudi-Grant Connection combines the knowledge provided by Human Anatomy with the experience of Service in the Army Medical Corps to investigate life and death.
Pagina dedicada tanto a noticias sobre cine, cómics, videojuegos, libros o series. Además, no faltarán reseñas de cualquier tipo o información sobre festivales y eventos
The Rudi-Grant Connection combines the knowledge provided by Human Anatomy with the experience of Service in the Army Medical Corps to investigate life and death.
Pagina dedicada tanto a noticias sobre cine, cómics, videojuegos, libros o series. Además, no faltarán reseñas de cualquier tipo o información sobre festivales y eventos
The Rudi-Grant Connection combines the knowledge provided by Human Anatomy with the experience of Service in the Army Medical Corps to investigate life and death.
Law that attracted me! 
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